The aim of this activity is to encourage you to be alert to conflicts and potential conflicts and to handle them early rather than late. Unresolved conflict is a slippery slope. Create your personal references for each stage of the conflict clues, so you will recognise when things are going wrong and need to be addressed.
Read the clues for each level and briefly give an example, ideally from your own life, e.g. “Helen and the photocopier” “The cleaning issue” “Relationship with my son” Write just enough that you are reminded what was like when conflict had reached that level. Then consider your own patterns of handling conflict.
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1. Discomfort
Think of an example in your own life, past or present, where things are or were not feeling quite right but nothing was said.
This response will be awarded full points automatically, but it can be reviewed and adjusted after submission.
2. Incident
Write a brief description of an incident where there was some minor unpleasantness between you and someone else? What was said that was upsetting? Did it simmer and cloud future interactions?
This response will be awarded full points automatically, but it can be reviewed and adjusted after submission.
3. Misunderstanding
Write a brief description about a time when you believed the other person had misinterpreted your feelings, motives or responsibilities or you had misinterpreted theirs? Briefly describe what that was like?
This response will be awarded full points automatically, but it can be reviewed and adjusted after submission.
4. Tension
Tension arises from a build-up of failed communications. Emotions run high. The relationship is weighed down by negative attitudes and fixed opinions. Briefly name an example from your own life or from someone you know or from the media. Describe this tension.
This response will be awarded full points automatically, but it can be reviewed and adjusted after submission.
5. Crisis
Think of an example where there is extreme behaviour – abuse hurled, overwhelming emotions, a job lost, a relationship ended, possibly violence. That’s crisis! Make a note here of examples that come to mind.
This response will be awarded full points automatically, but it can be reviewed and adjusted after submission.
6. Can you see a pattern in when and how you handle conflict?
Think of one relationship in particular. Write a sentence or two about when, how and how early you tend to deal with issues that arise.
This response will be awarded full points automatically, but it can be reviewed and adjusted after submission.