1.4 Fight, flight, freeze or flow

Fight, flight and freeze are instinctive reactions to threat. They may have served humans well in the jungle being chased down by a tiger, but in most everyday conflicts the adrenal rush is unproductive.

React or respond

We can choose to respond, to quieten our reactions down: to flow. What’s your mental image for this? Trees swaying with the wind? Water flowing around boulders? Flow encourages you to adapt to circumstances, to respond to what the other person is doing and lead the conversation in a positive direction. Flow may be about responding to a situation that you have not chosen or a force of nature that you cannot control. You must move alongside it. You are adaptable and resilient.

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