Dive in! Swim around
There are 12 lessons and 14 podcasts in this course on conflict resolution. You could glance through the topic headings in the menu to get a sense of the skills involved.
If you are presently facing a conflict, you might want to ask yourself these Trigger questions below. Which skills call to you?
You can start your course right there – at the beginning, in the middle, even at the end if that’s the topic that’s beckoning you.
Trigger questions to prompt your conflict resolution skills
Skill 1. Win-win – makes us Partners not Opponents: What needs underlie our positions on this issue? How can we solve this as partners not opponents?
Skill 2. Creative Response to conflict: What must I do to respond, not react? What can I learn here? What opportunities can this problem inspire?
Skill 3. Empathy: How can I open up the communication? What are they trying to say? How can I get past my reactions to allow for their personal style or their differing values?
Skill 4. Appropriate Assertiveness: How can I express myself so that I’ll be really heard and understood? Am I being clean, clear, concise and respectful?
Skill 5. Co-operative Power: Do we need to shift towards power with each other rather than power over each other? Is there a step I can take to move beyond disempowering relationships and behaviours?
Skill 6. Managing Emotions: What message is my emotion delivering to me? How can I use it as my fire for positive change? How will I best manage my own and other people’s strong feelings?
Skill 7. Willingness to Resolve: Am I informed or inflamed? Are there underlying personal issues that I need to acknowledge or release? Am I ready to move towards forgiveness?
Skill 8. Mapping the Conflict: What are the needs of the key people here? What are their fears? Will writing them down, making a map, give me greater clarity?
Skill 9. Designing Options: Can we develop some creative options together? How can we make more for everyone?
Skill 10. Negotiation: Am I being hard on the problem and yet soft on the other person? What could I offer that’s valuable to them? What can they offer that’s valuable to me? Can I include rather than reject their objections?
Skill 11. Introduction to Mediation: When other people are in conflict, how can I be helpful and skilful and still stay neutral?
Skill 12. Broadening Perspectives: Is there another way of seeing this? What’s the bigger context? What must remain uncertain? What will and will not change? Am I including my ‘heart’ as well as my head?
The skills that you really need right now are the ones that interest you the most!